A Time of Reflection

Today my daughter and I had to attend a very difficult funeral for one of her best friends and her mother.

During the service I began reflecting on the moment I had to tell Alexis that her buddy was already in the arms of Jesus. And while she was trying to cope with the news and thinking of not having Katie with her this year all I could reflect on in that moment was "What are they seeing up there?" "What is it really like?" "Do they realize they made it together, or are you aware of those things in heaven?".

It wasn't long before all the phone calls started and people were asking questions about the accident and so forth. But there was one question that stood out to me and made me quiver. I was asked "Were they a Christian?" , the answer was yes, and I did reply yes and there was no doubt they were such a beautiful family , but God really left that one question in my mind and is using it to reach others. Through the night The more I thought about that question the more God used it to speak to me.

Beth are you living a life that EVERYONE around you would know you are a christian and that you stand for NOTHING but Jesus? Is there a true relationship and love for others? Do you really pray for those in need and seek the guidance of God in EVERYTHING you do? Notice I did not say are you a church member. There are many in a membership, leadership role that really need to rethink what there life is reflecting.

At that moment God just used my mouth and my voice to tell my children and myself, You had better be living your life that Jesus would be reflected through you. I told Alexis, You need to live your life so that people don't question ..is she a christian? Has her life truly been changed by God and does she live her life to bring others to him?

Guys, Life is short, I know it seems like well today I have to do this, this, this and this.... But you know that may actually be your last day to do anything, so I just want you to realize how fast it is all taken away.

I am following a Blog of a local family, of which the mom has terminal cancer and she has three small children. she is still fighting and holding out hope that God will spare her time with her babies. A bit of background when you read this she is starting to realize that her Cancer is terminal and that she will have to leave these precious babies behind ... Her latest Blog entry really spoke to me and I think we can all learn something from her and the wisdom she is learning from our Great Master......

One day W was on a foam surfboard riding the waves in. I was watching him amazed at how old he looked. It wasn’t that long ago that B and I had him at the beach and he didn’t even like to touch the sand. Now there he was out in the ocean surfing waves. Every time he caught a wave he would yell, “Maaaaaama!” He would look at me to make sure I was watching and then as soon as he was on shore he would yell, “Did you see that?!?” This went on over and over again. Multiple times, the same routine. So as I was watching Will, I just silently cried out to God, “Do you see this? Do you see this?!? Who does he want? Who is he looking for? He wants me! He looks for me! If I die then to whom will he cry out? Who will watch him? Who will he want?” And without a sound, the answer came as clearly as if God Himself were sitting beside me: “He’ll cry out to me. I’ll watch him. He’ll want me.” Immediately I felt the color drain from my face. I thought, “God, has my undying love for this child been keeping him from all of You?”



Immediately I had this mental picture of a cross in the distance and W running to the cross with his eyes fixed upon the cross. Then I saw me stepping in out of nowhere and scooping him up. I wonder how many times I’ve seen his pain and in wanting his pain to stop, I’ve stepped in between him and the cross. Not just him, but his sisters, too. I wonder how many times I’ve circumvented them from the cross. They are my children and their pain is my pain. And there’s nothing worse for a mother than watching your child in pain. And the most natural thing in the world is to want to stop that pain as soon as possible. They are small and sometimes the cross just seems so far away. Why should they be uncomfortable when I can stop it? Because it keeps them from the cross. So as painful and as gut wrenching as that moment on the beach was for me, I praise God for it because it taught me something so important. I want to purpose to step beside my children when they are in pain, hold their hand, and walk them to the cross. It may take a little longer that way, but at the cross they will find relief that I am increasingly unable to give them. While they have been small, there hasn’t been much that my hug, a kiss, or a band-aid hasn’t been able to fix. But they are getting older. And as they get older, their problems will get bigger. One day, far too soon than I had imagined, it will take a lot more than a kiss or a band-aid to fix their problems. There will be no relief for them other than the cross. “Lord, give me Your grace to lead them to the cross. Let me lead them there while I can still stop their pain so that when I no longer can, the cross will be the most natural place in the world for them to go. Let be an asset and not a stumbling block. And keep teaching me, Lord. I have so much to learn.”


I hope today you will renew your relationship with JESUS and take a fresh look at what is important and how you might start living your life to reach more lives.


Beth Gregory